Heidi Bruder

Two years ago this past weekend, we found out that we lost a baby. We named this child Glory Baby. On the one-year anniversary of Glory Baby’s death, a dear friend gave me a book entitled Grieving the Child I Never Knew. I was deeply touched by by the book, but mostly by the fact that someone remembered this life-changing day. My friend and I share a special bond in this way…she was diagnosed with breast cancer the day before we found out we lost Glory Baby. It was the beginning of a faith journey for each of us. It was the beginning of a journey that forever changed each of us.

Anyway, back to the book. I confess that I have looked at it many times in the past year, but I never really started to read it. On Saturday night, I knew I needed something to begin processing through this baby’s death and dealing with my grief. I’ve been doing an excellent job of hiding from the reality of it. My grief became intense, overwhelming and lonely.

I opened up the book. It was written for me. It may be written for you. It was written for anyone who has experienced the loss of an unborn or newly born child. It is written for the parent who lost a baby 2 days ago, 2 years ago or 20 years ago. In the opening pages, the author writes the following excerpt. Perhaps you can relate.

“Grieving the Child I Never Knew is not a how-to book with pat answers about grieving the loss of a child. My hope is that this book will become your personal companion. Think of it as your trusted friend, who walks beside you and gives you permission to be who you are and where you are in your journey. If you are hiding your pain or hiding from people, then discover how God will meet you in your isolation. If you are suffering and need to cry, then weep with all your heart. If you feel like relating to others to help them through a similar journey, then connect. And if you are seeking hope, help and healing to press on in your future, then start today.

Whether you’ve recently suffered loss or lost a child long ago, my prayer is that Grieving the child I never knew will be a tool to guide you to a deeper understanding of who God is and will meet you in the pain of your loss and point you to Him” (page 13).

Grieving the Child I Never Knew is a powerful book consisting of 31 devotions that are intended to help begin the journey of grief and healing. It is a journey that I am embarking on. If you find yourself in a similar circumstance, I invite you to join me. I will be giving this book to anyone in my life that loses a child.

(Oh, and Diane, thanks for being with me as I begin yet another journey. You are a blessing.)